The Apologizer

I've become a different person since yesterday.  Honest.  I know yesterday was only three hours ago, and I'm probably wakin you up, but I hadta get this out.  I couldn't sleep.  My sheets are all twisted around my waist and. . . you know what, hon?  I'm gonna wash these sheets.  Just like you said.  You know, start takin care of things around here.  The ceilin.  I'll paint it first thing tomorrow.  Today.  Today later in a few hours.  Or maybe I should get that job you were, I mean we were, talkin about.  Not to take credit for your idea or nothin but I knew I shoulda had a job way before you eva brought it up.  I mean, no self-respectin man doesn't have a way to earn some cash, but you know, since I am now a way different person, I can share the credit withya.  So here's the deal, swee'pea: Numba one: get a job. Nubma two: paint the ceilin. Numba three: wash the sheets.  I figure I'll wash 'em after I paint so if any of the paint gets on 'em it'll come right out in the machine.  I can feel it already, sweetheart.  Can you?  No, don't answer that.  I know it; you do.